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FYI

SpongeBob is cool!

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i cant sleep. ive totally messed up my sleeping schedule. i go to sleep at 4am and cant even begin to wake up until 1:30. its really annoying because sleeping in late makes me feel blah the rest of the day. well i dont really have anything to say so im gonna talk about Ben S. its weird because i think hes kinda hot but our personalities really dont match up at all. plus he really intimidates me for some reason. actually all guys do i think its because my dad was always a really dominant person and would always get mad easily, and criticize me. grrrr its really annoying because im now really really shy and i hate it!!!!!!!! i cant even have a normal conversation with a person if i havnt known them for a long time. also im super sensitive around certain people and ive learned to hide my feelings. like whenever im sad ill hide it so people dont see that im hurt and try to make me feel better because for some reason that makes me uncomfortable even though i appreciate the fact that people care about me and are trying to make me feel better. i dunno im just weird. i also always have to have a crush. if i dont have a person to like ill feel sort of empty and blah. sigh.. Tibet..........

grrrrrrr.......

this thing is annoying it takes forever to load a new page. and it made me post an entry twice. oh well now you can see me bitch twice as much. yay!!!

1st entry

today was a weird day.... first i went to the mall and everything was either sold out or tackey. its all turned to shit. everything has either punk princess written all over it or safety pins on it or some other "punk" thing on it its so gross (yeah anarchy in the UK! -SLC Punk) Then me and a friend went to jorges to eat dinner and the waiter kept like checking me out and stuff, it was really gross. oh and we saw matt elsas there but i pretended not to notice him. then i went to alison, sammantha, and hannas house. yeah it was weird because i dont like them very much. then my other friend came over and started bitching out john and stuff on AIM. thats just perfect because now im gonna have to deal w/ his shit when i go back to school because he thinks it was me who said all that stuff. but oh well i dont really care. i hate that school and almost everyone in it. i think im gonna move to tibet and give up all modern life its just total bullshit. i hate worrying about what other people think about me and having all this pressure from home about school and making money. i could care less about money. i just wanna have peace and live a simple life where my only worries are drawing my bath water from a well and feeding my chickens. will you move to tibet with me?